Nobody can be alone. We all need someone or the other in our lives at every turn which life takes for us. There are many battles to be fought and they cannot be fought alone.
But, there are certain battles which one has to fight alone. One MUST fight them alone. Battles with your inner side. Battle with the demons inside you. You can’t take help of others when it comes to fighting your inner demons. You must do it alone. You must learn how to do it alone. You can’t castigate others for not understanding what you are going through. Its your battle with your inner demons. So its your job to defeat them and come out victorious.
Its not a question of “You can” or”You should” . There is no question as a fatter of fact. Its only, “YOU MUST”. Life takes you for a ride. All you an do it learn to enjoy it no matter how bumpy the road might be. Because in the end, the battles fought are the ones which make you strong and ready fro the next one.
You must keep on moving forward and learn to fight.
For all of us out there, sipping our morning coffees and running late for work. A virtual hug for all of you!!
Life has become so monotonous with this corporate life that I think we have entered the age of robots already. And here I refer to us as the robots to avoid any confusions . Look at us!! We wake up, rush to read the paper, make breakfast, have coffee on the way to work, and as soon as that laptop is switched on, human emotions are switched off. Nothing remains except “issues to be resolved”, “cases to be cleared” , people to be fired and people to be hired.
I guess during those 10-11 hours, our brain is doing all the work while our heart is at rest. But the funny thing which I realised is even after those tiresome hours are over, our heart has little to say. As we tend to hit repeat the moment we think out heart is stirring from its slumber, trying to stand up. And the story continues.
Where is the time for our heart to even disclose what it actually wants. We are in a constant loop. And it doesn’t stop. Doesn’t even pause as a matter of fact. Remember, in those sic-fi movies or the superhero movies, when the world is taken over by the bad guys/robots/ant people, a superhero comes and saves the day.
Well, now would be a good time to press pause , wherever the hero is!!
There was a time when getting a “Good” written by your teacher would become the best day of your life.
There was a time when getting that extra hour to watch television before going to bed was like an achievement.
Those were the simpler times I must say. Look at us now!! We are a part of a race. We have lost the meaning of happiness. No one is satisfied, no one is content. We all want more and more. Better jobs, more money, bigger house, beautiful partner, fame, etc. When does it all stop??
Those simpler times, when after a long day at school , getting appreciated by your teacher , having an extra piece of cake at dinner, watching the TV would give us the feeling of pure content and a sound sleep. What has happened to us now?? Nothing is simple anymore. No one is at gratified anymore.
We have a tumultuous relationship with life now. It will never be simple again. But we should always try to find a loophole, and find the simple sweet things that give us a sense of satisfaction. Spending time with your loved ones, reading your favourite book and making people smile. Maybe these tiny acts counterpoise the rush hour life which we have now. Maybe these make things tiny bit simpler for our benefit.
There are certain situations which one cannot explain in appropriate words. There are certain heart breaks which leave one in a purgatory abyss.
I stumbled upon a close enough explanation for one such situation/heart break. It dawned upon me while I was listening to this song called”Bleeding Love”. When someone doesn’t love you back and leaves you in that abyss, it hurts like an open vein. BINGO, I told myself!!
How much does it hurt?Is there a measure?? I really don’t think so. This is something which you cannot measure. Is there a rating scale?? Love now a days is daily process, people fall in love and people fall out of love and its on repeat. But the hurt which follows after every heart break isn’t pleasant. No matter it was a one day affair or a 10 year relationship. Love is love. And when the heart is broken , it will hurt. You would rather a vampire suck all the blood in your vein than experience this pain.
Yes, I am a little dramatic and use fiction to express my feelings. But hey, so do many others !! There is no harm in using fiction to hide your love or show your love. And the open vein I am talking about, I don’t get what kind of retribution it is for. When you love someone and its not reciprocated, it hurts . And the fact that you can’t let go exacerbates the pain raised to 100.
You know that feeling when you think, “Screw this shit, I am done!!”
I am sure you all do. We all have that feeling time and again.So I am going to elaborate on that feeling today.
I have been away for a long duration from my blog and I am appalled that I have not yet lost my followers!! You all are great by the way !! So, coming back to that feeling. I have been working in the corporate sector for a while now. Apart from the few good friends I have made and the salary that gets credited in my account at the end of every month, its palpable that “Screw this shit, I am done” comes to my mind frequently. That feeling when you do everything meticulously and still get a mouthful is beyond my understanding. I am sure all those who “work”, no matter where they work , will relate to what I am talking about.
Then comes that feeling outside work. As if at work wasn’t enough. Life just throws it all at you, expecting you to scoop and dive and jump like an all-rounder olympic champion all at once. Sounds like fun!! Outside work, it’s people expecting you to be brave and shine at every step in your life. You cannot always be bright and shiny. There are days when you are dark and sulky and just want to be that ay for a while. But God forbid you get peace!! People (friends and family whom I do love with all my heart) say stuff like “Buck up!!” “Get over it” “Cummon, you have been through worse” “Dont get down just because you had a bad day at work”
Well, I am no GOD. I have human feelings and at times like these I do have feelings like asking everyone to “Shut the hell up!” “Let me be” oh, not to forget sometimes to smash my computer on someones head!! I am sure most of you will comprehend with that feeling the most.
The definition of fixated is “cause (someone) to develop an obsessive attachment to someone or something.”
Now as we have cleared that, I do agree I have a tendency of being fixated way too often. As I have agreed to that, what I don’t get it how should I get it out of my system. Yes, if I like something I need to know everything about it that very moment. I start a book, I need to finish it that very day as I cannot tolerate the rush which goes within my veins thinking about it. I need to get over it soon. If I like someone, again, I am attached(too quickly for my own liking). It has come to my notice that I have been born in the wrong era. Being attached to humans beings in this era is way to hazardous than one hopes for .
Its not like I don’t get reality checks . Because I do. Every new chapter in my life brings along with it an epiphany, but I just don’t seem to learn. And I guess its not just me but many people out there who have this “issue” I guess. This trait dos help me in my work as I do my job well, with every ounce of my heart in it. But again, can’t do anything about it in the personal front. I will have to make do with this “issue” . I will get attached, I will get sad, I will get over it and I shall repeat it again. Its a loop in my life which will never stop. Every epiphany is lead by yet another fixation!!
“In vain have I struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you.”
Yes, those are the golden words said by Mr. Darcy to Elizabeth , expressing the “ARDENT” love he held for the lady. Do they sound cliche?? Not at all.
But in this era, will you find someone who would confront you and tell you EXACTLY how they feel?? I don’t think so. Now a days, telling someone how you feel is called ” Cliche” or “cheesy” . Also, finding someone who actually says such words is like finding a three headed dragon in this town. So to sum it up, pretty easy.
I am also one of those people who day dream of finding their “Mr.Darcy” . But again it comes to the point where even I call it “Cliche” when someone remotely tries to say such words. Why is it so? Is it because we are so used to the liras and the cheats that now we wouldn’t know true love if it slapped us on our faces. Just to save ourselves from another heartbreak , we cringe from the cliche of it all. But deep down, its actually what we want- get another chance at love and see if this time you have found your Mr Darcy or not.